Sticking up for a poetry competition

I have never entered a poetry competition in my thirty years of writing. Recently, perhaps due to my involvement with the study of digital literature and digital poetics etc, I have begun to receive a lot of emails and messages about various such competitions. Me being me, I decided to write a short sort of traditional poem about that this evening.. I stuck up a first draft below:

Sticking up for a poetry competition.
By Michael J Maguire

Everybody, get your words in the air.
You ! wait, compose yourself there.
get yer grammar up against that wall,
forget about: syntax withdrawal !
this is a poetry stick up after all.
You, you at that screen…….
What rhymes with scream ?
Better be something better than dream.
What…. Serene ?
Obtuse and obscene
Don’t think you can stall
In that rhubarbarian drawl,
This is a poetry stick up after all.
You, you with one jimmy chew shoe
Tell us something poetry’s verbs do
Action words.. that’s right
Like make, create, and incite.
Pasteurise ?
What a surprise, you’re milking a visual gag
Half pints of cream in your Louis Vuitton bag
A cross eyes concept not worth a scrawl
such soured, people; poets, waiting to fall.
This is a poetry stick up after all.
Use empty noun vaults
You know it’s your faults
Dig down and root out
What expression’s about
Enjambment and clout, flout
rules, stretch metaphors tall
this is a poetry stick up after all.
I don’t want excuses
For corpulent uses
sum swelled out maths language
rhetorical abuses
interrupting interjection’s call
raising requirements to enthral
this is a poetry stick up after all.
Sing not her or hymns or even pro noun
So gently put those naming words down
Each, teach, on your own
Or with the joy of a clown
Own your own voices
Make ridiculous choices
Adverbs and prepositions
Under preposterous conditions
will sneak their way sideways
Into your compositions
to so simply exclude you
From form felt renditions
Riddled, remember this call
This is a poetry stick up after all.
Adjust your adjectives
To no one’s objectives,
Regulations are vulgar and crude
Forget tense, voice and mood
eviscerate shrewd
Subsuming in clued
mirror self-reflective sentences
To be served up as food
For thoughts to collude
Which you cannot forestall..
This is a poetry stick up after all.
In conjunction with knew lexical laws
I hereby declare all flaws
invalid, intestate, revoked,
The road crossing Chicken’s been choked
cleared, cleaned of clichés, and smoked
To death to meet any shortfall
This is a poetry stick up after all.